Namaste

"Share~Grow~Become"

Thank you to William (AGAIN!) for reformatting the blog template so the blogs appear correctly!

I am in the process of transplanting my blogs from other sites, and this is just a little time consuming.

Thank you for your patience as I bring things together!

Spiritual Information

Attack of the Shadow Selves

Tuesday, 10 January 2012 19:28 |

Written by Quirin |

Blogs - Spiritual Information

For many of us, it has been a veritable Attack of the Shadow Selves here lately. If we aren't dealing with one of our own - some of whom have re-emerged from ancient sealed vaults of the past - then we are being submitted to treatment by someone else's. It is a tough bit of path to navigate, especially when so many of these things seemed to be already dealt with and now here they are again, annoying and draining us.

Thing to remember is that this is a HUGE clearing. Not only are so many experiencing it (if we look around and half the world seems to be in the same boat, it is a planetary clearing process), but you can bet that when things that have been long believed resolved come knocking on the door again, that indicates a spiral up in the personal processing of these energies. We DID deal with that crap before. And now here is the DEEPER stuff about it, now that we are a little more able to dive that deeply.

It is tough work, it is hard on the Heart and Mind. But to have reached the place where we are DOING it - seeing it and dealing with it and restructuring the stories around all of it to better serve us into the future - is such a good sign of our progress. It is such a certificate of graduation into the higher grades of this school. We may stand perplexed and frustrated in moments, but we should also stand proud and strong, knowing that this moment of challenge has presented itself now because we have EARNED the right to resolve it. We are that much 'more' ('stronger', 'together', 'capable', whatever) than we were before, so that we may embrace and heal this portion, now.

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LET GO

Wednesday, 14 December 2011 09:49 |

Written by Quirin |

Blogs - Spiritual Information

Thus far in my current process, I will share one thing that seems rather important to me. I have spoken several times about the fact that we are sort of in a space of conjunction, of overlap, between two Ages, between two paradigms. In this space, there is a great deal of stress, confusion, chaos and difficulty. We are ALL experiencing it, though we are expressing it in different ways. We are ALL experiencing it, even though many of us would claim otherwise. It just IS.

It is IMPERATIVE to remember this, because we will see it reflected in our interactions with each other, and disaster will be borne upon much misunderstanding and unwillingness to BEND like the resilient reed. In our ego stances, we WILL hurt others, and we WILL be hurt – sometimes from the most astounding of sources.

The battles are being fought on every level to overcome the imbalance. There are mighty unseen armies contending for the right for Peace and the freedom of Love. If we could see the Force of our individual Souls as we do our work, we would be in awe of ourselves and the power we wield. All of this is occurring from the very mircocosmic level to the incredibly macrocosmic. Straining, stretching, sorting, weaving, conflicting, finding balance. It is a PROCESS we are involved with, and we are more out than in, still, of the new energies’ focus. We are still CLEARING a great deal.

We will gain great insights and gifts to aid our processes. But we will ALSO suffer intense loss and pain. We WILL ride ALL ends of the gamut – and that is part of the design. We must not allow this experience and sensation derail us. It may well be considered a weapon of the enemy – to distract us from the true work at hand, which lies WITHIN. We must realize that all temporal experiences are NOT REAL in the sense of the larger reality, and determine in that moment to hold fast ONLY to that which is Eternal and Everlasting. All else will run like water through our ethereal fingers. So, let it ALL GO.

Whatever IS, is in existence because it serves. That which seeks to dissolve no longer serves. LET IT GO. It opens the space for the new thing. WHICH – incidentally, can ALWAYS be the thing just vacated, reformed. We are made anew in every moment – especially when we are consciously creating ourselves. So there is always a chance to ‘regain’ what we have ‘lost’. But in the end of all things, there is never a loss. Even when a situation seems to no longer be aligned, it becomes not one whit less of the Whole than it ever was. We are ALWAYS together in our Hearts. Part of the Eternal, those connections we make.

Blessings as we forge ahead. Is there any other way to go? Hold hands and play nice. It’s how we all get to the big picnic at the end, you know.

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The Highs and Lows of 11:11

Sunday, 13 November 2011 01:28 |

Written by Quirin |

Blogs - Spiritual Information

In these hours post 11:11, I think it’s important to relate what some might consider to be an unusual effect of all the high energy celebrations and events of this most auspicious date. So many of us have been in preparation for this day for a long, long time – looking towards the number on the calendar as a sort of sign post at which we had all agreed to come gather, all of us from across the Globe. I know I can say it is the largest gathering of Lightworkers I have ever witnessed within the scope of this one lifetime, and it was an amazing series of events of which to be part. I was in and out of the energy flows all day long, as well as before and afterwards – after a rather enduring odyssey with illness that had also resulted in a serious lack of sleep for weeks previous, as well as having been inordinately busy for several weeks beforehand.

Honestly, I was not sure I was UP to it, on some levels. But on others, I was INEXORABLY CALLED. Had I been near to DYING, I could not have stopped my almost involuntary participation in the doings of the day. Part of me had been hardwired to do ‘whatever it does’ at that time, regardless. I was only conscious of running energy intermittently. It was mostly just like I was simply a vessel to be filled, and it was all an automated process.

I am not one known to have many ‘mystical experiences’. The few I can say I am certain I have had have been poignant and singular. My spiritual path is a terribly mundane one. No angels dancing in my living room, no disembodied voices telling me mysterious secrets, no journeys out of the body, no aliens landing in my back yard, no Masters inducting me into the Galactic Federation of Light, no dictated books (dang, that would be nice...) – nothing. Everything I get is SO subtle in its nature that it is nearly imperceptible even by MY over-inclusive self. But there are times when the subtle flow is so unmistakably trying to TELL me something that it is undeniable. That has been the case again, here lately. Another blog for another time, about the endless synchronicities that flow in moments... quite the story around that one theme, alone.

At any rate, I had participated in the Fire the Grid Worldwide Meditation at 3:11 am my Pacific Coast time, after having arisen at 6:30 the previous morning, having run all day the previous day and having had only a few scant hours of sleep during what one could perhaps marginally call ‘the night’ of the night before. (I rarely go to bed before 1 am, as a rule.) I was both euphoric and likely half dead at the same time. Into the second week of pretty serious bronchitis, on steroids and antibiotics that weren’t really doing the job, sleeplessness, hyperness, and an unending Call to be serving in some energetically strenuous way (the weeks previous had been all about the Occupy movement – which I have since had to shelve for a little bit due to illness and strain and LIFE). I’d then laid down for a couple hours after that initial meditation, arisen for the usual morning routine, fallen down again for a couple hours, arisen in time to prepare and make an appearance for the local 11:11 observance, then fell down again.

So sick. So tired. And I felt the cosmic energies streaming through me like fire. Alternating, in periods. I would run really cold for like 20 minutes, then super-hot for approximately the same amount of time. As I joked later with a friend, NO – it was NOT hot freaking flashes. I KNOW what those feel like, and they are not like THIS. I would feel the rush of something flowing through me, head-to-foot and I would get really hot. Then the flow would slow and cease and I would cool off. It was like that from midday on the 10^th all the way throughout the day on the 11^th. Never had hot flashes like that, thankyouverymuch!

Then, later in the afternoon, something that SHOULD have been insignificant happened – that no one had intended, that no one devised, that no one had meant to harm me – that hit me a thousand kinds of wrong and it sent me into a mental and emotional spin – from out of NOWHERE. I had maintained a VERY high vibration throughout, and then all of a sudden I came crashing back down to somewhere BELOW Earth. It was like someone had punched me in the gut, I felt so devoid of wind, so knocked for a loop.

As I expressed the experience to one of the people my mind decided to hone into concerning the matter, I began to see a whole other pattern of perspective revealing itself to me. This person likely does not know the Service they may well have provided my soul, just by letting me say my piece and not having any argument with me – but also not shutting me down in the middle of it. Sometimes we have to act a little insane to discover the core of our sanity. Such was the case here. I made an ass of myself, got upset over something that NO ONE ELSE understands (because it came UTTERLY from WITHIN me), and exhausted myself all over again.

But in the midst of that, the hard shell was again cracked, and I could get to the meat of several matters that I have been unprepared to address for a long time now. Been a little busy addressing a million OTHER matters in my life. But this opened an opportunity to face those things within me that were not serving me well, and to again begin to excavate and clear them out from within my own construction of self. I claimed an opportunity to do battle with one of my shadow selves. I could just as well have remained confused and angry and hurt – and maybe even ended up depressed about it all (which is what the less conscious DO), but I was blessed with enough clarity from within the fog to make a better choice for myself.

So I apologized for my bad behavior, attempting to explain myself (which is really pointless when you can hardly understand your own actions, yourself), and returned again to where the focus REALLY belonged – on myself.

Blah blah blah... all that to say that, so often in the New Age community there are all these expectations of how things should go. At least that’s how it seems and how it feels to one just beginning on their path. There are all the questions about WHY am I not seeing the freaking angels and how COME I keep having crappy things happen to me when I am working so hard to follow these formulas to success and trying to be so real about it all? Why does everyone else get the unicorns with rainbows coming out their butts all the time? WHY MEEEE? Haha Thing is, when the work gets REAL enough, people start to realize that this journey is NOT just one big fluffy puffy joyride in all moments. In some periods, it is DAMN hard work!

I have spoken with several people now who had similar experiences. Many of them felt they had ‘failed’ in something. I certainly had that feeling with my sort of implosion that went all haywire. But the further away from it I stood, the more clear it became to me that I had been gifted another piece of my own puzzle, that while I was thrashing about and throwing a fit, a lesson was being presented to me. Sheesh. I am a slow mover. Sometimes takes me EONS to get around to my lessons (I believe this may be literal). Here – BAM BAM BAM they’re coming at me like gangbusters. What the hell are gangbusters, anyway? Are they like ghostbusters for gangs?

Anyway, so I am sharing with people that the crash is NOT a failure or a fault. It is a GIFT. We were BLASTED with a Force that cracked us open. What we are SUPPOSED to do with that is to peer inside, see what it is that’s in there and explore it. Learn from it. Discard that which no longer serves and fill the space with something that DOES. Heal it. Love it. Embrace it. No matter what sort of ugly you found in the experience – it is yours. It belongs to ALL of us, for we are each part of the others. That thing that got brought to the surface against your will – that is your gift from the Universe to heal that portion of yourself. To find Wholeness in that place that perhaps – if you’re anything like me – you have simply not been able to go before, for whatever reasons.

I had a magnificently positive beginning to my 11:11 experience. I will be writing about my specific meditation experiences. I felt I did a lot of good work to contribute to the Whole in our process on this day. But I also had a very difficult extension of experience that seemed to bring me low very rapidly – until I realized what it WAS. We are all struggling with so much these days. I do believe that is in the process of changing. It may get worse before it gets better. But it WILL get better, because we have ALWAYS known who ‘wins in the end’. And it is the end. And it is the beginning. And we are all the ‘winners’.

In times like these, we must remember to turn back to our inner being and see what is being revealed to us. It is never about something else. When we are suffering, it is ALWAYS about US. Not the others. External exploration can and will only ever lead us right back to ourselves, if we are honest about what we are seeing and follow the clues properly. The blow, the shock, the pain, the turmoil (again, all internal) are simply the indicators that something needs to be SEEN and RESOLVED within us. Something is out of resonance. Something no longer serves. What is it? What can we release? How can we use what we are being gifted to reveal more of our true selves to ourselves?

And always remember this: The greatest thing we can do for our own positive evolution is to offer first and foremost to ourselves our own Patience, Understanding and Forgiveness. ♥ Even when we do not feel like it, we are still doing OK. No matter how things may appear, everything is ALWAYS in Perfect Divine Right Order for our greater benefit and growth. We just have to discover what we are being given. And use it.

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Quotes from "Soulshaping" that continue to help me shape myself...

Friday, 22 April 2011 18:28 |

Written by Quirin |

Blogs - Spiritual Information

"Soulshaping - A Journey of Self-Creation", a book of raw process by Jeff Brown.

http://www.soulshaping.com/

"I was awestruck by the depths of my shame, by the mother-load that obstructed my path. I had lugged this body around for thirty-five years without fully knowing, and the world seemed to reward me for not knowing. The more effectively I wore my masks, the better I was rewarded by a culture that celebrated the outer life. It was like a giant conspiracy to avoid emotional truth.

With the weight of my shame shackles, it is little wonder that I couldn't stay connected for very long before falling back into separateness. Birthed in shame, the bad boy's sentence was to stumble through the cosmos alone, forever prohibited from connecting to anything outside himself. A separate universe felt safer, and the limits of my isolated entitlement."

"In property law, the law of adverse possession allows us to become the owner of someone else's property if we use it for a certain length of time. Emotional property us no different. When someone takes their stuff out on us, it moves from them to us. It remains ours unless we choose to give it back, to express rather than repress the feelings that arise from the experience(s). The longer we hold on to it, the more likely it is that their property will concretize inside us and become fully our own: the law of averse posssession. Often without realizing it, we move through our life emotionally taxed for carrying someone else's stuff. By not saying "f*#k you," we have f*#ked ourselves.

Best to not buy into the cultural judgment around anger - it is not an unworthy emotion. If it expressed in a healthy way, it will restore our emotional integrity and bring us back to life."

"The truth is that no one else can definitively know the path we are here to walk. It's tempting to listen - many of us long for the omnipotent other - but unless they are genuine psychic intuitives, they can't know. All others can know is their own truth, and if they've actually done the work to excavate it, they will have the good sense to know that they cannot genuinely know anyone else's. Only soul knows the path it is here to walk. Since you are the only one living in your temple, only you can know its scriptures and interpretive structure."

"The recipe is simple. Be authentic and true to your felt experience. Feel the heartbreak. Feel the anger. Feel all of your feelings. If you had a cruel father, move your anger and feel into the heartbreak below. If you lose a loved one, go through all the stages of grieving. Don't stop halfway. Never stop halfway. Let the feelings tell you if the fire was destructive or benevolent. Some fires are creating the way for new life.

Be careful not to go into your head. There is a meaningful difference between a cerebral interpretation of an experience ("I know why this came into my life") and an embodied awareness of it ("I feel why this came into my life"). Unless your knowing arises from your felt experience, it is meaningless. Stay with the emotional process until your soul food is digested. It will be difficult at times, but the feelings will only hurt until they convert. Repressed emotions are unactualized spiritual lessons. Once they make it all the way through the conversion tunnel, the spiritual lesson will be revealed. Divine perspiration."

"The ladder to heaven is made of broken rungs."

Thank you, Jeff, for writing this book.

(all quotes from "Soulshaping - A Journey of Self-Creation", by Jeff Brown)

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Ringing Earth - Tibetan Monks in "spirit cave" hear new sounds

Tuesday, 15 March 2011 21:52 |

Written by Quirin |

Blogs - Spiritual Information

Stresses on Earth are causing sounds to emanate from the earth through caves. Could it be why we are seeing so much seismic activity on the planet? Here is the original article: "There is a secret cave of spirits in Tibet. This cave is not known to the public. The tibetan saints are sleeping in this cave. The oldmen and monks are saying that Shiva is starting to sing his mantra calling for Gods to return to the Earth. This mantra has three levels. The last level means the coming of the new era. Listen to this sound recorded by russian enthusiasts who were allowed to visit the place near the cave where it was possible to record the sound. This sound has no artificial changes and is presented in raw format (only noises were reducted).

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